by James von Dielingen
Hangnail, oh hangnail
You monarch of pests!
For so long you've racked me
with the painiest tests!
I quest to maintain
my sanity, while you
work my last nerve till
I run myself through.
Oh Pain of all pains,
how you haunt me all day!
I bite and I snip but
you don't go away!
You bothersome nuisance
at the tip of my finger,
please leave here at once!
Don't dally or linger.
I may take a knife to
Cut off this digit!
I’ll have to be sure
To keep still and not fidget
Wait! What have I done?
I have bitten you gone!
Now with what will I fiddle
or obsess upon?
Hangnail, oh, hangnail!
I miss you, old boy!
You gave me a purpose,
and brought me such joy!
To think I would cut you
away with a knife!
Hold on. Wait a minute.
I must get a life!
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