Elvis Slept here, believe me, it’s true!
If you believe that, I’ve a bridge to sell you
The deed is right here under Bigfoot’s left shoe
Along with this can of Triceratops Stew
If you want I can sell you this piece of the sun
No, it only looks like a glow stick in a bun
I tell you, this unicorn horn is quite cool
I grants wishes, tells fortunes, and cleans out your pool
This south monkey’s paw is used to get your revenge
Just take it along after I sell you Stonehenge
Sit back and relax next to the Fountain of Youth
It works like a charm, best believe that’s the truth!
I know what you’re thinking, “Is that mummy King Tut?”
It certainly is, down to his bandage wrapped butt
All this can be yours for a very fair sum
Your friends will admire you, and not think you are dumb
I’m telling no fibs or whatever you call it
So, come on you cheapskate, and get out your wallet
